As with ‘conventional’ dating, anyone using online dating to find their life partner should be aware that the pitfalls of rejection are just the same. In fact, they can be even worse as, whilst building up an online relationship prior to meeting, you are likely to build up an idealised view of your potential partner. Whilst there is nothing wrong with this, however ideal you may feel them to be, if the chemistry is not there when you meet, it is likely that one of you will be rejected.
How to handle online rejection
Rejection, however it happens, can be very hard to take especially if you were hoping that the relationship would go further. However, everyone will suffer rejection at some point in their life and the secret is to accept it without bitterness and move on. This also applies when initially searching for an online date. If you contact someone and they do not respond or block you, don’t persist in pursuing it but have a look around the site to find someone else who you could potentially meet. In fact, persistent ‘chasing’ of a person on a site could be perceived as stalking which is likely to get you banned from the site, and with new laws coming into place, could even bring you into trouble with the law.
If you find that it is you are getting too many rejections, then it is worth taking a look at your profile. Is it perhaps a bit empty? Could your passionate interest in camel racing perhaps deter most women? And perhaps the photograph of you drunk on holiday isn’t putting over the best side of you. Stand back a little and try to view your profile as others would.
How to reject others
There is a tendency, when dating online; to consider the other party as just being ‘online’, however, at the other end of the computer is a real human being with real feelings. So, just as you would decline a relationship with someone in real life, you should do likewise with an online date. Take their feelings into consideration and let them down gently and, where possible, offer positive reasons in order to make them feel good about themselves. For example, a little white lie such as “I think you’re really cute but I have actually met someone here already” will allow you to reject someone but without putting the hurt onto them.
Whatever you do though, be nice, both to the other party, and, if it is you that is being rejected, be nice to yourself too and don’t give yourself a hard time.